Thursday, April 24, 2014

Creeping towards Friday on little cat feet

I made it through the dreaded goodbye lunch at job #1 by yakking with my friends as if we were having any other lunch. I love my work friends and they are pretty much the only things I’ll miss from here (and, bonus: you can take friendships with you when you leave!) I’m not sure why I dreaded the lunch that much. I think I feel guilty about leaving this career for the second time in 5 years and I guess I imagined that realization would be hanging like a cloud over my head the entire lunch?

Onward and upward!


  • I’m setting up appointments with a career transition coach I’ve used in the past. She’s AWESOME at helping me sort out a plan of action, roping in my daydreamy thoughts and forcing me to articulate my values so I can avoid falling into the same ole’ same ole’ career/trap just because it’s familiar and I keep thinking that it couldn’t have been THAT bad last time I did it (note to future self: it really was that bad – trust your gut).


  • I was just offered another small job for the Fall that will bring my income back into a near-normal range, at least for that semester. I’m relieved, but then the second I feel relief in not being immediately “in trouble” I start feeling stress for only just “getting by.” Sick of worry, sick of stress (and this is only my first day back in the “transition” trenches…)


  • Two months ago I found out I didn’t get in to a program in my wannabe-new-career field – I can’t even describe the amount of work I’d put into it, and the disappointment I felt at the rejection. But today I have a… what would you call it, a rejection interview? --- with someone who can go over my application with me and hopefully tell me what went wrong. I’m half convinced they’re going to tell me I’m too old (no, that would probably be illegal) – or that my background in former-career, no matter how prestigious, isn’t good enough?  Or, worst of all: there was nothing wrong with my application, but the numbers weren’t in my favor. That one’s the worst because there’s nothing you can do about it, no action plan, and applying again would feel like banking on a winning lottery ticket. 


  • I managed to mix a salad dressing for my spinach salad that, when combined with the chopped apples and chicken I threw on top, smelled exactly like the noxious chemical I’m using at work this week. I’m starving, completely unable to eat the salad with the poison smelling dressing, and forced to eat leftover Easter candy to make my stomach stop growling. My 5 year old self thinks this is great news, but my 40 year old belly says nuh-uh. :(


  • It’s still Thursday. It’s been Thursday forever. It may always be Thursday.

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